So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize