I don't usually arrange sex via text message
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
