there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
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