so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
This baby is an asshole
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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