Nicole vs. Life
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
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