well you can't waste a boner
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
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