I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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