I hate all girls vehemently.
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
Its about making memories worth repressing
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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