you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
