I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
