she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
I see more hoeing in ur future
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