i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
