Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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