YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
