Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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