Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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