Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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