He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Randomize
