no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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