dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
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