i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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