my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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