i just google imaged poop.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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