Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
