So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
