wrigley field is MILF paradise
Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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