Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Randomize
