i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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