By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Randomize
