The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Randomize
