No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
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