4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
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