it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
