people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
