so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Randomize
