I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
Randomize
