I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Randomize