K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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