I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
We don't watch enough power rangers
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Dicks are not precious.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
