FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Randomize