I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
