he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
