glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
