Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Randomize
