Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
He had one of those small greek statue penises
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
I'm just crazy horny about you
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize
