We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
Randomize