We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Bring me that man meat
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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