UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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