Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Randomize
