Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
