At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
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